"I try to write poems and short stories."
"Just weird situations."
"What kind of situations?"
"Disintegrating friendships, and things like that."
"So why do friendships disintegrate?"
"I just think that people’s interests change. And relationships have to be built on some sort of commonality. So once that common ground is lost, it’s very difficult to get it back."
TUMBLR I’M ENGAGED
RELATIONSHIPS, EVEN JUST FRIENDSHIPS, ARE ABOUT GIVE AND TAKE ON BOTH SIDES, THEYRE ABOUT TWO PEOPLE, IF SOMEONE ACTS LIKE UR RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM NEEDS TO REVOLVE AROUND THEIR GOALS AND EMOTIONS ONLY THEN FUCK THEM THEYRE NOT A GOOD ENOUGH FRIEND PROBABLY I realized this week, don’t abandon them but don’t be too close until they deserve it fuck , frick dang k idk
and the best part is i found it.
i just want someone to roll around with, someone to turn over and pull me close. a person who will cradle my face and stare into my eyes. he will understand me with a simple glance, and his hands will send sparks across my thighs. i will want him all around me, breathing him in, feeling the sweat ripple down his back as my hands get sticky from it. i want to feel his sweat breath, the kind of breath that grabs hold of anything and everything, the kind that i cannot get enough of. i just want someone to tell me what they want without making me feel awkward, but can take an awkward moment and laugh it off. i want someone to be vulnerable with, someone to break down walls together, be truly naked in a way that we’re all so scared to be in. i want to feel lust, i want to be on his mind for days after. i want to yearn for his touch again, i want to be able to feel the same way he made me feel weeks after, i want to be held and caressed and told i’m stunning. i want to be appreciated.
i don’t want obligation, i don’t want him to be selfish. i don’t want to feel not good enough, and i don’t want to be told what to do in a condescending tone. i don’t want to be pushed, i don’t want to feel guilty. i don’t want to leave the next morning feeling resentment, i don’t want to be alone. i don’t want to reach for him only for him to pull away. i don’t want to be told i should work out, i don’t want to believe he is right. i don’t want to get comfortable or bored. i don’t want the same thing every time. i don’t want to be abandoned in my time of need. i don’t want my vulnerability to be taken advantage of. i don’t want to feel like a chore, and i don’t want to be left in the dark. i don’t want what i’ve already had.
A List of “Men’s Rights” Issues That Feminism Is Already Working On
Feminists do not want you to lose custody of your children. The assumption that women are naturally better caregivers is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not like commercials in which bumbling dads mess up the laundry and competent wives have to bustle in and fix it. The assumption that women are naturally better housekeepers is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to have to make alimony payments. Alimony is set up to combat the fact that women have been historically expected to prioritize domestic duties over professional goals, thus minimizing their earning potential if their “traditional” marriages end. The assumption that wives should make babies instead of money is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want anyone to get raped in prison. Permissiveness and jokes about prison rape are part of rape culture, which is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want anyone to be falsely accused of rape. False rape accusations discredit rape victims, which reinforces rape culture, which is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be lonely and we do not hate “nice guys.” The idea that certain people are inherently more valuable than other people because of superficial physical attributes is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to have to pay for dinner. We want the opportunity to achieve financial success on par with men in any field we choose (and are qualified for), and the fact that we currently don’t is part of patriarchy. The idea that men should coddle and provide for women, and/or purchase their affections in romantic contexts, is condescending and damaging and part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be maimed or killed in industrial accidents, or toil in coal mines while we do cushy secretarial work and various yarn-themed activities. The fact that women have long been shut out of dangerous industrial jobs (by men, by the way) is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to commit suicide. Any pressures and expectations that lower the quality of life of any gender are part of patriarchy. The fact that depression is characterized as an effeminate weakness, making men less likely to seek treatment, is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be viewed with suspicion when you take your child to the park (men frequently insist that this is a serious issue, so I will take them at their word). The assumption that men are insatiable sexual animals, combined with the idea that it’s unnatural for men to care for children, is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want you to be drafted and then die in a war while we stay home and iron stuff. The idea that women are too weak to fight or too delicate to function in a military setting is part of patriarchy.
Feminists do not want women to escape prosecution on legitimate domestic violence charges, nor do we want men to be ridiculed for being raped or abused. The idea that women are naturally gentle and compliant and that victimhood is inherently feminine is part of patriarchy.
Feminists hate patriarchy. We do not hate you.
If you really care about those issues as passionately as you say you do, you should be thanking feminists, because feminism is a social movement actively dedicated to dismantling every single one of them. The fact that you blame feminists—your allies—for problems against which they have been struggling for decades suggests that supporting men isn’t nearly as important to you as resenting women. We care about your problems a lot. Could you try caring about ours?
Excerpt from If I Admit That Hating Men is a Thing, Will You Stop Turning it Into a Self-fulfilling Prophecy?, by Lindy West (via lullabysounds)
Feminists do a whole lot more for men than many of the men whining that feminists don’t do enough for men.
Think about that for a while.
This is a documentary from Australia’s ABC TV, discussing the role of censorship in creating an environment where pornographers are forced to give models virtual labiaplasty at the hands of their graphic designers. It talks about how Australian censorship is skewing our ideas of what normal vulva look like, and could be giving rise to an increase in cosmetic labiaplasty (labia and clitoral hood reduction surgery). I have posted this documentary before, but it’s worth bringing to the surface again, especially for all my new followers who may not have seen it.
I’ll also be posting the transcript of an extended interview with one of the members of Australia’s government censorship board, which is very enlightening. Watch this space.
WARNING: Contains graphic images of actual labiaplasty surgery
i hate everything
I grew up in a small town of 2,500. I have only lived in the same fifty mile radius my entire life. When I graduated high school, I watched all my closest friends move away. Some went to college, some moved states for the hell of it. I stayed in my parents’ house working awful retail jobs, silently freaking out that I would be Stuck Here Forever.
Things at home weren’t…well, good. That is Another Story. As I grew older, things became harder. My dad wanted me to have more responsibility. I felt pressure to buy a car, buy this, buy that, and I watched my bank account never have more than a few hundred dollars in it.
California is an expensive place. I didn’t have enough money—for anything. I was definitely stuck. Relationships began & ended and they never took me anywhere. I was drowning.
Then I met someone on twitter. He was incredible. Everything I wanted. After some discussions we decided: I was headed to Colorado. The big thing again: Money. I began to save, pinching pennies as much as possible.
Things got worse at home. I needed to Get Out because it wasn’t safe. But neither of us had enough for our own place in CO. Luckily though, I had some friends in North Carolina, kind enough to help me out.
I sat in my bed, the one I had for years. I looked out the window to my backyard. The white paint chipping off the fence. I watched the roses swinging in the gentle breeze. The sun warmed my skin as my heart skipped beats.
The decision to move to NC was discussed with Rev, though he didn’t make any decisions. I did.
For the first time in my life, I was doing something for myself. I took the money I had saved, and booked a flight. I was getting out. I wasn’t stuck.
Leaving California was hard, and every day I’m reminded that my bed there isn’t mine anymore. That I don’t see those roses swaying in the breeze. What I do have is the ability to say that I am proud of myself. I am happy. I did it.
FIRST THINGS FIRST: if you want to participate in this giveaway/contest, you must be following me on twitter. once you’ve done that, continue reading!
OKAY here are the terms for my Watercolor Giveaway:
-Tell me about a time when you felt really proud of yourself. When you felt accomplished and happy and thought you could do anything.
-send me an email to email@example.com explaining what you did. it doesn’t have to be a paragraph, if you wanna tweet it to me you’re more than welcomed to. the email is an option in case you want more than 140 characters. If you enter on twitter please email me your address & a link to your tweet.
-I will be accepting entries until 9 PM EST.
-Tomorrow I will announce four winners!! I will basically be picking my favorite stories from all the entries. Make yourself stand out :)
In the email please include your mailing address so I can get your painting to you as soon as it is finished. Also include your twitter handle so I know who you are :) I’m giving myself two weeks from today to have all of these done! When I mail them out I will send you an email letting you know to keep an eye out for your painting.
Happy Valentine’s Day my friends. Today isn’t about having a significant other or having a date. Treat yourself today. Love yourself and share it with me :)